


Something Stupid (Like I Love You)

by pasdexcuses



Category: Social Network (2010) RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-04
Updated: 2012-02-04
Packaged: 2017-10-30 14:20:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/332683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pasdexcuses/pseuds/pasdexcuses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Andrew is head-over-heels in love with Jesse. He can’t help himself. He just… He just feels such joy when he’s with Jesse. So much joy that it turns him into a cartoon character — Andrew has seen himself in interviews, okay? He looks like Bambi and no one has ever made Andrew look like Bambi. Even his mother agrees.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something Stupid (Like I Love You)

**Author's Note:**

> So, because I clearly have nothing better to do with my life, I'm writing those short one-shots that I've been wanting to write for a while but never got around to because I'm lazy like that. This one is based on _Something Stupid_ by Robbie Williams ft. Nicole Kidman. Unbeta'ed.

  
**Disclaimer:** This work is NOT REAL. And, obviously, I’m not making any money from this. 

**_Something Stupid (Like I Love You)_ **

_Do not cock this is up, Andrew, don’t you dare cock this up_ , Andrew repeats over and again in his head as he threads his hands nervously through his hair. He’s been giddy all night. Giddy enough that Jesse has started giving him these long, are-you-ok-please-be-ok-oh-god-this-might-be-giving-me-a-slight-panic-attack looks that are doing nothing to relax Andrew, who might as well be having a panic attack on his own. Because this is it. This is it. There’s no going back after tonight. 

It’s silly, if you really think about it. Andrew has said “I think I love you, Jess” more times than he can remember. And Jesse used to protest (“I really doubt that, Andrew, we barely know each other”). But then he got used to it and teased Andrew about it (“Just because I bring you coffee, Andrew. Is that really how easy you are?”). Now, Jesse sort of smiles like he knows Andrew is just saying it to say something. Like he knows that Andrew means he cares but not necessarily that Andrew’s in love with him.

But that’s where he’s wrong. Because Andrew is head-over-heels in love with Jesse. He can’t help himself. He just… He just feels such _joy_ when he’s with Jesse. So much joy that it turns him into a cartoon character — Andrew has seen himself in interviews, okay? He looks like Bambi and no one has _ever_ made Andrew look like Bambi. Even his mother agrees. 

If he’s being honest, Andrew hasn’t said anything about Jesse’s misunderstanding because… Well, because he likes Jesse far too much to lose his friendship. And so far, that’s been more important. Jesse’s friendship has been more important than pouring out his heart like a lovesick teenager. Andrew has been very reluctant to putting his foot in his mouth and saying something incredibly stupid. Like, “Hey, Jess, guess what? You know when I say I love you? What I really mean is I’d like to shag you madly.” Because sometimes Andrew actually fantasizes about saying things like that. Appallingly cheesy and explicit things so there’s no room for any misunderstandings.

But, if Andrew’s mother is saying Jesse turns Andrew into some sort of derange woodland creature, well, something has to be done.

And tonight’s the night. He’s telling Jesse. He’s getting Jesse alone (he has reservations for some expensive restaurant that they’ll both probably hate but this is how these things get done, right?) and he’s saying he’s in love. Andrew is saying that.

Which is precisely why he’s about to drive himself insane while he waits for the awards ceremony to be over.

“Andrew, what’s going on?” Jesse finally breaks, his hand on Andrew’s, effectively stopping Andrew’s tapping on the armrest.

“What d’you mean?” he shoots back, flashing a smile but now tapping his foot.

Jesse moves his hand to Andrew’s knee to, again, stop Andrew’s tapping.

He gives Andrew a look that on anyone else would say ‘do you honestly think I’m that stupid?’ but that on Jesse looks like some bizarre cross between worry and disappointment.

Andrew sinks in his chair.

“You can tell me,” Jesse prompts, still looking at him.

“’S fine.”

“ _Andrew_.”

And of all the things that Andrew could possibly say at a time like this, of all the endless possibilities, what Andrew’s mouth chooses is to blurt out, “Will you have dinner with me?”

He wants to smack his own head Jesse stares in confusion.

“Sure. I mean, aren’t we all having dinner after?”

“No,” Andrew starts because, again, Jesse is misunderstanding. “I mean like- like you. And me. And, uh, no one else. Having dinner.”

“Like a date?”

Andrew opens his mouth and is about to say a very enthusiastic ‘yes’ when Jesse’s eyes widen in horror like he realizes he’s said something incredibly inappropriate and starts backtracking before Andrew can say “yes, Jess, like a date.”

“Sorry. _Shit_. I’m sorry. I know it’s not a date. Fuck. Sorry,” Jesse mumbles.

Andrew lets him go on because he knows saying it’s a date will have no effect on Jesse now. 

“So will you, then?” he asks when Jesse starts on how he’s always messing up and Andrew can’t force himself to take this anymore.

“Will I what?”

“Have dinner, with me.”

“Uh. You still want to?”

“Yeah. I have.” But then he thinks saying _reservations_ would probably be awkward. “I know this place.”

“Okay. Okay, let’s do dinner after this.”

At this, Andrew flashes a bright grin. He knows he’s making the cartoon character face again but he can’t be bothered. He’s too happy.

*

“This is the place you know?” Jesse asks, surprise written all over his face.

“You hate it.”

Dammit, Andrew knew Jesse would hate it (he hates it, too, actually).

“I… No, it’s just… You know, you said you knew a place and that usually entails a dark alley and a place with questionable licenses.”

“That… That is so not true, Jess! That makes me sound horrible!” Andrew protest as they head inside the expensive place.

At the door, a man in a pressed suit asks them if they have reservations. 

Jesse shuffles his feet uncomfortably, probably thinking up some excuse. He must miss Andrew’s flushing face because when Andrew says “Dinner for two, under Garfield” Jesse all but gawks at him.

They sit down on a table by a window with a beautiful view into the city. The waiter brings them the menu, recommends a couple of wines and leaves them to decide what they’re having.

Andrew’s still pink. He’s flushing through the waiter’s description of the chef’s choice and the talk about wines. He’s still flushing when the waiter leaves and Jesse is just… sitting there.

Then Jesse snorts. Andrew forces himself to look at him and when their eyes meet, Jesse has to put a hand over his mouth because he can’t stop laughing.

“Oh, god,” he says, trying to control himself but then Jesse looks at Andrew and starts laughing all over again.

“I don’t see what’s so funny.”

“You brought us! To a- a- a freaking expensive restaurant! And you have reservations!” Jesse says like it’s the funniest thing ever and Andrew still doesn’t follow. “You brought us to a place for _couples_. You actually, actually did it!” Jesse keeps laughing. “And you wonder why people talk,” he finally says, managing not to snort for once.

“I… are you okay, Jess?”

“What? Yes, yes. _I_ am fine. You, on the other hand, must be having some sort of brain damage because I’m pretty sure someone was taking pictures when we got here.”

“What d’you mean?” Andrew asks, slightly panicked.

“Andrew, you know what they say. The rumors.”

“Huh?”

“About us,” Jesse gestures at the space between them. “You know, how we’re allegedly sleeping together.”

“Oh, that.”

Andrew is glad for the water that’s already on the table. He gulps down half his glass.

“Yes, that. And now they’ve got pictures. Of us walking into a restaurant that I’m pretty sure can be filed under ‘quite, romantic and expensive’,” Jesse says, looking around him. “Actually, I think I heard Rooney saying something about this place and marriage proposals.” Then Jesse stops himself and stares at Andrew before he breaks into a grin. “Aw, Andrew, darling,” he starts with a very appalling british accent. “Are you proposing to me, light of my day?”

Almost choking on his water, Andrew coughs and tries to compose himself because he might as well be proposing.

“Andrew, oh, my god, Andrew. Are you okay?”

“Yes.” Andrew coughs into his napkin. “Fine, I’m fine, Jess.”

“Good.” Jesse’s eyes move from Andrew to his lap. “Look, is there something you want to tell me? Because, you’ve been… odd.”

“I… Actually, there is.”

Andrew waits until Jesse is looking at him properly again. He takes a deep breath.

“Oh,” Jesse starts, a little sad. “I see. Look, I understand if you’d rather not talk after this whole thing blows over. I mean, you have a girlfriend and it’s perfectly normal for her to be bothered by all these things they’re saying. I get it, really.”

“I broke up with her.”

“I honestly under— Wait you _what_?”

“I broke up with her. She… she wasn’t right for me.”

“Oh, my god, Andrew, are you alright? What am I asking, of course you’re not. So, is that what tonight’s been about? You’re like, heartbroken or something? Not that that’s not terrible. It’s terrible. It’s horrible, really. Oh, I’m making this worse, aren’t I? Andrew, I know I’m really bad at this but you know you can talk to me, right? It’s gonna be okay, I promise. We’ll watch cheesy movies and I’ll let you borrow my cats and—”

“Jesse, I love you.”

And Jesse stops rambling. He stops and looks straight into Andrew’s eyes. His face softens in that familiar way that tells Andrew he’s getting it all wrong. Again.

“I mean it,” Andrew adds.

“Andrew, I understand,” Jesse says and Andrew shakes his head.

“You don’t. I love you. As in, I’m _in love_ with you. As in, I want to kiss you. It’s not… I’m not just saying it to say something. I… Fuck, Jess, I’m so _in love_ with you that you turn me into a cartoon deer. And my mother agrees so you know it’s not a lie.”

Jesse doesn’t speak and Andrew feels the ground beneath his feet starting to slip away. He feels like he’s falling slowly as Jesse just stares.

“What? Wait a minute, _what_?”

“Shit, this was a mistake.”

Finishing his water, Andrew stands up.

“Wait a minute, Andrew!” And Jesse is standing up, too. “You can’t just say that. And leave. God, you’re such an idiot.”

With that, Jesse takes Andrew by the wrist. He drags them across the room and into the bathroom.

“You can't say stuff like that in a place like this, Andrew,” Jesse starts once the door’s been closed. “You can’t spring this stuff on people! I mean, what did you expect me to do in there? What were you—”

“I love you,” Andrew says again to interrupt Jesse’s rant.

“You said that.”

“But I mean it. Every word. Every time.”

“Every time?” Jesse parrots, incredulous.

“Yes. I’ve… been in love. For a while.”

“Oh, _Andrew_.”

“I mean it, Jess. I love you. So much.”

“I know.”

“No, you _don’t_ understand.”

“I do.”

“Jess, I don’t just—”

“Andrew, I’m not an idiot. I know what you mean.”

“No, you—”

“Andrew, I _know_ , okay? I’ve seen you, you know, staring. And I probably stare just as much because I wouldn’t have noticed otherwise.”

“So, you’ve known. The whole time.”

“I guess.”

“Then why didn’t you say something!”

“I could ask the same.”

“I didn’t know.”

“Andrew.”

“Fine, I had a slight suspicion.”

“A slight suspicion?” Jesse asks but he’s already laughing and closing the distance between them. “God, you’re impossible.”

And Andrew could protest. He could say he’s not more stubborn than Jesse but Jesse’s face is an inch away from his and he’s been waiting for far too long. 

Dipping his head, Andrew presses his lips to Jesse. He kisses him and this well of pure, unadulterated joy breaks within him and Andrew feels like he might be drowning in all that happiness. But Jesse’s still there when Andrew opens his eyes. He’s there, biting down on his lip and being absolutely adorable about it.

“I love you, Jess,” Andrew repeats.

“I love you, too, Bambi,” Jesse says back, smiling.

Andrew almost can’t believe Jesse just called him Bambi. But it’s fine. It’s more than fine because Andrew loves the dimples on Jesse’s face, even when he’s making fun of Andrew’s ridiculous cartoon face. Which, by the way, he is most certainly making right now. 

  



End file.
